The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
