I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
