Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
