her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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