Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Houston, we have a squirter
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
