Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
