she was so not down for the gang bang
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
