I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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