soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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