i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
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