I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
