My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
