is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
