I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
