You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
