I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
