this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
