No stitches, just platelets and will power
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
