Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
