You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
