They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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