Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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