Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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