He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
