atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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