yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
