he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
