Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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