so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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