we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
