i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Come on in and take your pants off
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