i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize