Where is the hickey?
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Randomize
