my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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