Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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