and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
