dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
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