Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
