At least make sure they are 18
Why
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
