It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
