i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
