so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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