Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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