think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
