is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
