I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
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