he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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