hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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