He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
