I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
