there was a trapeze. enough said
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
