You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
